You heard that story about the bug that crawls in your ear while you’re sleeping? Or the one about the astronauts that crashed on a planet ruled by retarded monkeys? Or that one about what you’d do to the asshat who’s stealing your lunches if you caught him? Then there was the one about violent video games turning teenagers into killers. And the one about the time you were so hungry you could eat pretty much anything and I mean anything? Read them now. Before it’s too late.